You need to be in it for the long haul when you say those “I do’s”. It wil not always be easy being married. For us we had the traditional vows as it kinda was the only option at the time. So, it was a literal “in sickness and in health”.
35 years ago, we couldn’ have imagine getting old… But it happens in those 35 years. It happened.
Both Bobby and I have some health issues. Bringing new challenges to our relationship. It is the love that is getting us through these trying times.
A simple case of the “flu” turned into a bout of A Fib with an unexpected week in the hospital. A nightly ritual of a EKG: https://www.alivecor.com Diet changes. Lifestyle accomodations given to Mother Nature, i.e.: health alerts for vulernable populations.
Something that when we were young our minds never envisioned. We kinda had rose colored glasses of youth with non of the challenges that age brings.
I’m 63, BobbyD is 69… it is a long road well worth the journey. Not giving up but looking forward to another 30 years. Making the milestone of our fifty anniversary. “Mine for ever more”…
“Mine for ever more”, the Beatles.
“Love is a long road”, Tom Petty.
When I met BobbyD I was out on the town with the girls. BobbyD and he asked me to dance thus started our 36 plus romance. Something told us both that night we were “into something good…”
There was a chemistry that was undeniable. However; without the romance or work of a relationship our love would not have lasted 36 plus years.
Romance is work! Hard word! However; it must be a labor of love. Kinda in the definition of the word “romance”.
Romance isn’t without its share of troubles otherwise it would just be lust. Not a judgment just an observation.
Thus one thousand years just doesnt’t seem long enough for a Devine Marriage.
To make it in the long haul you need to not be selfish. You need to give one thousand percent everyday. Without that total committment you will not be able to sustain “love”. Bad times will come trust me. Bills will need to be paid. There will be sickness. There will be sadness and sorry…
Without that one thousand percent commitment it is easy ~ way to easy to give up and go your own way.
A needing to give one thousand percent. A daily walk hand in hand keeps love alive. No matter if the relationship is 2 days old, 20 days old, 20 years old, or 36 plus years. It is a committment that you need to consciously make on a daily basis.
I think it boils down to the long run. The person you choose to spend your life with has to be the “one”. Come what may, during the trials of life they have to the “one”.
Happiness is important to me. In my senior years with my senior wisdom I have found for me that I need “happiness”. Further I need to be around people that make me happy. In our relationship therefore I needed somebody who enjoyed doing the same kinda things I did. Going out and experiencing new things. This I believe keeps a relationship fresh and vibrant.
We started with very humble begins and continue in that same humility. Nothing fancy only a simple dream on my part of growing old. It is 36 years later and I remember that first dance as if it was yesterday…
Life has not been filled with anything but the riches of love. That love sustaining us through the rough seas of life.
In my arms with all it’s charms. An intimate walk through life. Holding that person close. No further apart, than arm’s length apart.
We belong to this group called “1st fridays”. Once a month we get together with guitars in hand and sing folk songs. Our friend “Joe” does this tune well and it kinda says it all. “Dreaming” of love. Awakeful dream, a constant dream of that person.
I’m not talking about obsession. But a wanting of that person. A need fulfilled.
The proverbial “thunder bolt” You will know when it hits!
Dreams do come true, just kinda have to make them happen. Hard work… but worthwill endeavor.
“As we stroll along together,”as the song goes. “Holding hands,” is so important. You don’t want to hold that persons hand or be seen holding hands then you kinda need to relook the relationship. This applies to whether the relationship is new, or 35 plus years in the making.
BobbyD every winter has dry hands. Some years worse than others. That ability to look beyond the superfical is what keeps us together. Holding hands. Kinda simple but vital in a relationship.
Holding hand is very intimate. The person your holding hands with can only be one arm apart.
The simple act of being intimate through holding hands. Walking arm in arm. Hugging. Has kept our love the same or has deepened it for those 35 plus years of marriage.
So no matter what the relationship is think to you walk to go through time with that person holding hands? A simple question, for better or worse. Through sickness and through health. Holding hands!